True to my last blog, last weekend, my husband and I planned to hit a hiking trail a few hours away from home. But as the new reclaimed individuals we were, with 4 other reclaimed individuals, we flaunted our freedom by adding wine tasting to our itinerary prior to the hike. (Don’t ask.)
As we lingered enjoying a beautiful winery, 4pm suddenly arrived, leaving us in a quandary of whether to order another bottle of cabernet or pursue a potentially more satisfying path before the park closed. Neither was a bad choice.
When choosing between two equally compelling activities, how do we make the more satisfying choice?
Subliminally, we followed these four elements to make our decision:
First Element: The activity must be valuable to us.
Inspiration does not promise satisfaction. It can motivate us, but we must find value in the activity itself. In the case of a hike, we knew, from previous occasions, that despite feeling a bit tired, we would enjoy the hike. It was a trade we were willing to make. We knew the effort would be equal to the reward.
Therefore, when searching for the more satisfying path, a preliminary attribute is that we find value in that activity. Making an incredible meal may be worth the effort but only if you value food. If food is not at all important to you, you may be better off spending your time and effort elsewhere. Whatever we choose to pursue must not only have value, but must have value for us.
Second Element: The activity must possess a glimmer of something new.
As humans, we crave an unknown experience. A new movie, a new song, a new restaurant. Our fascination is heightened when the experience gives us a thrill that is thus far, unknown.
For us, in this case, the hike was brand new. And thus, it held the promise of what I like to call new satisfaction. A satisfying road must include the new car scent or some element that is new for you, otherwise it will not be as satisfying.
Third Element: The activity must be pleasurable, to us, both during and at the end of the activity.
If the activity was great fun for me but not necessarily for my spouse, he might have just as easily said, “You go hike. I’m staying at the winery.” And I could have as well. Too often, we get caught in activities that others want to do, and we go along. And on occasion, we may surprise ourselves and find something satisfying that way. But I’ve found that knowing what we like in advance is a better guarantee.
And if we can derive satisfaction while in pursuit of the activity and at the end, like an achievement of sorts, that combination offers the best experience. The hike, though at times challenging, was tons of fun during the climb, and at the end, offered amazing views. Each stage must offer some realm of joy which leads us to the fourth element.
Fourth Element: The activity must have a true end point.
Nothing can be satisfying if there is no finish line. You must have a sense or feeling of getting to the finale. A heightened sense of satisfaction arrives upon reaching that point. If the activity extends for a longer time, we must celebrate even the small wins, as they happen. Otherwise, we will lose our steam and our satisfaction for the activity, during the process.
Motivators Do Not Guarantee Satisfaction
For some people, FOMO, peer pressure, or money spent, each can be motivators. But none are linked to satisfaction.
I may choose to go sky diving with friends so to not miss out on it, or because they pushed me to go. But no matter how many friends come with me or how much money I’ve spent on it, I will not find it satisfying if jumping out of an airplane is terrifying for me.
Even if what your co-workers, friends, neighbors, and family members may do in their free time may not be satisfying to you, they can be sources for positive influences and inspiration towards potentially satisfying adventures.
In the case of last weekend, by doing the hike, we indeed chose the more satisfying (albeit rocky) path. Should you ever be forced to decide between a grape and a rock, be sure to look for right elements upfront to help you decide. Always know that a more satisfying path can only be satisfying if it is more satisfying for you.
~ Roopal Badheka
Note: The photo of the zinnias garden is from Becker Vineyards in Fredericksburg, TX.
Insightful, as always! Thank you for sharing.
Thanks for reading!