I’m a born planner. The weekly calendar, the structured spreadsheet, a litany of to-do lists – all are my favorite tools. Like Hannibal, in the popular TV show from the ’70s, The A-Team, I, too, love it when “a plan comes together.” However, when a plan goes awry, being flexible is not my natural response.
But a lesson earlier this week taught me to consider an important question: When plans adjust to our benefit, are we able to accept this gift from the universe, or do we go into the change kicking and screaming?
A Suggestion, Pour Moi?
As a planner, I revel in having thought through every element of a project. Recently, for a project that I was working on, complications arose, and then a suggestion was offered. But I had a plan and this suggestion veered off the plan. I was determined (aka stubborn) to follow the plan set in my mind. Once I decided to at least try the other method, it worked much better!
Later, when I had time to process my own reaction, my avoidance of trying something different but finally giving in, I realized that there was a message, a new learning bestowed by Universe.
The End of an Era
As I alluded to in my last blog, for my husband and me, being empty nesters is new. I realized that as kids grow up, we, as parents, fire at all cylinders. It’s a requirement. Must do breakfast, must pack lunch, must have something ready for dinner, must do bedtime reading, must do homework, must explore activities, and the list goes on and on.
Without discipline and a plan, there are risks of not achieving goals. Progress is derived from pursuit. Once they make it to college, all that movement must come from themselves. Now, there are no musts. There is nothing to force, no one that I have to plan for except myself…
In this phase, I realize that all that pushing comes to an end. A new skill must be learned. And that skill is flexibility. That’s the lesson I learned that day.
The Power of the Stretch
Now, I must be open, I must be ready to adapt and change, and not lose my mind as schedules shift, or if I change them. In essence, I can accomplish tasks without the planner, the to-do list, or even the excel spreadsheet.
I don’t think it’s any surprise that they tell us to retain our flexibility as we get older. Stretch, stretch, stretch! I think, for the first time, they might be referring to more than our bodies. True wisdom lies in keeping our minds flexible.
Flexibility keeps us in touch with a higher power that can guide us with a slight tug or a push. We simply have to be willing to listen and to adjust because those suggestions will be slight. They will be nothing like the schedules and plans we adhered to in the past.
When we sense that stubborn streak taking over, step back, and recognize that pushing is no longer necessary and it never really was. After all, wisdom whispers, it doesn’t yell. Intuition is suggestive, not commanding. And moving towards ease, in any phase of our lives, may be as simple as following a random suggestion even if it doesn’t fit the plan in our heads.