Valentine’s Day – the quintessential time to celebrate love… unless disaster strikes in the form of unmet expectations, bad (expensive) dinners, babysitters running late, or customer meltdowns – all leading to stress and misery! Let’s face it; a night out on the town works so much better when both of you are happy already.
Instead of the burden of that one perfect evening and your loved one’s everlasting proclamation of their love for you, use V-Day as a perfect reminder that we are in control and in charge of our own happiness. It is not dependent on some -thing or some -one. First, accept personal responsibility for that!
Once we approach the holiday from that perspective, it reminds us that Valentine’s Day should start by taking time to celebrate love… for ourselves first!
A Guarantee Starts with You
Remember that self-love is an integral part of a self-care routine and is critical to personal satisfaction and growth. Once we take time to appreciate ourselves, we can better appreciate our loved ones. It’s a foundational step that can make all the difference, but one that not many of us take time to do.
Start the week or day by asking yourself… how can I first honor myself? Give yourself a gift of time where you truly ask yourself… “What do I want to do to make this day perfect?”And then listen for the answer.
Maybe you want to…
- Take a brisk walk to grab a steaming cup of coffee somewhere.
- Curl up with a book or succumb to a relaxing massage.
- Wander or drive aimlessly. Get lost without GPS.
- Turn off your phone for a little while.
- Buy roses for yourself! (yes, they allow that)
- Relish time alone: take the day off, get a hotel room, order room service, watch re-runs of Friends while contemplating your next promotion, or business venture, visualize a vacation in the Caymans, or even better, just mentally check out from life for a little while, and sleep… 😊 (Just a suggestion)
Allowing yourself a moment to breathe, without complaining or worrying about what comes next, is an absolute luxury. Give yourself that!
Too many of us are frazzled in our daily lives, and then rush off to Valentine’s Dinner and wait for our other half to refill our emptiness and top off our level of joy, and then complain when they can’t.
News Flash: No one can fill your soul like you can! No one knows better what you need than you do!
Listen to what YOU want to do. Have the courage to hear yourself, and then follow through. [Hint: Meditation helps us to hear ourselves.]
Share A Better You
Cherishing one another is an important aspect of all relationships… but you must cherish yourself first. Appreciate yourself first. Love yourself first. Honor yourself first. Give to your relationship with the best of you! You can’t give your best if you are running on empty.
Relationship success starts with the attitude that both people bring (to dinner & life). If either one is grumpy, malcontent, or worn out, that makes Valentine’s Dinner just another chore.
Instead, use Valentine’s Week to get yourself to a happier, fulfilled state of mind BEFORE that special lunch or dinner with your loved one. Taking time to do that will exponentially improve whatever comes next… a romantic escapade, a dinner and a movie at home, or an ice cream cone in the neighborhood Marble Slab.
When you both come to celebrate love already satisfied and joyful about your own lives, then you have something wonderful to share with each other.
Lastly, release the day (and your loved one) from the burden of an Instagram-worthy Valentine’s Day. Save the pictures for another time. Relax. Engage. Appreciate. Then just go with the flow and enjoy the evening no matter what (no victim-hood here)!
Either way, such an attitude & approach will guarantee a better Valentine’s Day! Enjoy!